happy new year and more about my hair

it's 2010 and i'm still trying to become a long hair. i had it cut yesterday, or "shaped" as my mother would say. and i'm not gonna lie... it's looking great. but that comparatively... it had been so long since i'd been to the hairdresser that i had a lot of feathery hair going on and was not far from looking like an early kristy mcnicol.

now, according to the czech coat check, i look "like elvis pressley... not in bad way".

afterwards i got drunk and said i'll run it next year.

i watched the marathon this weekend with some friends in long island city. i was really surprised at how much fun i had shouting encouragement to all the runners. who knew that being nice to strangers was so rewarding? lots of the runners wrote their names on their shirts so you could call out to specific people.
"GO CAROLYNE!" i yell.
carolyne turns her head while running and replies, "it's caroline... but thank you anyways."

and that really irks me.
first of all, just say thank you or ignore me completely.
second, if you want people to call you caroline don't spell your name with a "y".

i was recently reading...

some blog, and i came across this.

There’s a moment upon entering an elevator where your life is revealed to you.

It begins when your elevator begins to descend. You either silently hope that no one else gets on, or you welcome the chaos of a new person. When someone does actually enter, you have one of two reactions: you are welcoming them into your home, or they are a German soldier and you are French. This moment is a reasonable barometer of your life.

and i thought, "oh my god! thats me! i'm the french, i hate riding elevators with people i'm closing off my life to others and i will always be alone!"
and i was kind of depressed about this all day.
and then i thought, "wait a minute. that's bullshit. you can't just make up some pithy statement about elevators; that they're a judgement about your life and that you are either open to possibilities or shut to the world."
it's not that easy. yes i should be more open to people and life... but that's a bad analogy and life isn't black or white... also after reading over that quote a second time i've decided it's poorly written.

on my way to san francisco

i took my vacation in san francisco this past week, visiting my friend amy and my brother luke. in the spirit of adventure (and my budget) i took the subway to the airport.
as i was getting off the train and lugging my suitcase to the air-tran a very nice latina women asked me where i was going. when i told her i was headed to san francisco she replied in a very friendly manner, "oh! you a homo! i thought going to the beach to put your feet in the water!"

i'm kind of embarrassed to say this outloud

...but i'm addicted to the books that "trueblood" is based on, the sookie stackhouse series by charlaine harris. now don't get me wrong... i very much enjoy them (it's a series of nine so far and i'm on the ninth book... i started the first about two months ago)but there are some things about them that make me cringe and hide the cover when reading on the subway.
the main character is a 25 year old woman, but it's very clear and uncomfortable that the writer is a fat old white lady because of the following reasons.
1. the way she describes the young characters clothing... LOTS of pantsuits, slacks, shells, and hose... kneehighs. none of these things would be worn by someone who is 25.
2. the descriptions of attractive men... listen, i find big broad shouldered men attractive to... but the way she writes it feels like she's a step away from just saying he looked like patrick swayze or mel gibson.
3. the sex scenes. are kind of graphic. and whenever i get to a particularly juicy one i can't help but flip to the back and look at the picture on the jacket...



and think she wrote this.

this all came to a head when my friend gina was over the other day and picked up one the books i'd left laying around. after reading the synopsis and she embarassingly asked what "panther brethren" were.
"a community of werepanthers", i answered... and then caught myself at how silly it sounded. but seriously they are really enjoyable.

but when you think about it, it is kind of true

the other morning i got coffee from a different shop than my usual. not surprisingly there was one of your run of the mill new york crazies inside. he was about 50 and wearing dirty sweatpants with a sensible amount of gold jewelry. it looked like he had finished his coffee hours earlier, but decided to stick around to hand out delightful bon mots and advice to the ladies who worked there.
"you women", he says at the top of his lungs. "you women, spending so much money. spending all your money on makeup and tampons."
"that's right", responds the lady at the counter. "but, we do it all for you men."

best new game ever

so i'm pretty sure that after the naming of her twin girls everybody knows that sarah jessica parker is not just kooky when it comes to fashion.
marion loretta elwell and tabitha hodge are quite possibly the worst names ever given. they are definately names to grow into... i'm sure by the time they reach 65 they will finally feel comfortable with them. my friend marica and were joking around and she said, "she might as well have named them burlap and pickn'save".
i was telling this to my roommate jermaine and we just kept the ball rolling to invent my new favorite game, called "hi, i'm sarah jessica parker."

instructions:

step 1.
say "hi, i'm sarah jessica parker. have you met my new babies?"

step 2.
insert two ridiculous and hideous baby names/objects that would be owned by old women. to give you some inspiration here are some of our best... shoestring and straw hat, fried chicken and church clothes, price is right and chin hair.

i for one would sooner name a child toothpick before loretta... even if it is just a middle name.